Ever Learning

Family Strewing – When Your Kids Strew Things for You

Strew. It’s kind of an interesting word. When I google it, the dictionary tells me that it means, “scatter or spread untidily over an area” and that’s what I used to think about anytime I heard that word. Now it means something else to me as well.

Most people who are involved in home education of any kind, whether it’s homeschooling or unschooling, are also familiar with the word “strew” in this other context. I believe it originally came from a wise, but fairly casual, reference that Sandra Dodd, an unschooling mother, made to strewing her children’s paths with interesting things. It made sense to people and became part of the language.

There is sometimes a whole lot of interesting and useful conversation about strewing, particularly online, but simply put in my own life, I see it as setting things out, offering, or making things available that our children might be interested in.

They might be physical things that I actually do spread or scatter untidily, as the dictionary definition suggests, like a bunch of  graphic novels I noticed when I was at the library and dropped beside the chair for my daughter. It could be a small, wooden chess set, perfect to set up on the couch, that I notice later in the evening while tidying something and put down on the side table. They might be digital things such as a word game or link to a website or online book.  It could be a fascinating fact. It could be a hilarious video. It could be a funny clip or blooper from a show we all or one of them loves. It might be an idea or invitation of places to go. It might be a new kind of food! It might be something traditionally considered “academic” but it doesn’t have to be. Learning is everywhere. It’s wonderful and almost bizarre when you think about it;).You can’t escape it, except maybe to sleep, but even then you might have dreams to analyze! 

At some point in the last few months, I realized that others in the house were strewing things for me.  It’s like an ongoing back and forth of facts, ideas, jokes and suggestions. Now they actively send photos, mention ideas or leave things out that I might be interested in. I’ll get a text when I’m at work about a bird arriving in the backyard that they think I’d be interested in seeing. They ask if I’d like to learn games that they know. I have a bit of a current focus (obsession?) with our backyard cottontail rabbits so they’ll call quickly to me if they think one has returned or is doing something funny. They’ll find something in nature that they know I’d be interested in seeing or simply share what they’ve noticed themselves.

How and Why?

Some of this, I think, is that my oldest son is at college a couple of hours away and so sharing of photos, jokes and websites has become an easy way to connect. Part of it might just be that I kind of noticed it and started paying attention and now it seems to be all the time ( kind of like when you get a certain type of car and suddenly everyone has one). I’ve just now been interrupted twice by S as I’m writing this – once to be called to the window to see a different kind of bird he thought I’d like and want to know about and another time to mention something about a game he thought I might find interesting.

Secondly, my husband naturally strews. Like quite intensely. He’s always thinking of music, shows and facts that other people might like or get something out of. Things to pass on to us, to extended family, to friends, to people at church. I think my husband has always been a “strewer” and I’ve just never thought about it that way until recently. As quite an introverted person, it’s kind of a neat way for him to connect.

Also, I’m realizing that I am a natural strewer/ sharer of information. When I see a book, hear a song or instrument, find out about a place, my mind often links to who else might like it and many people know they might get a quick text from me in the middle of a parade, museum, forest, etc with a photo or a link to a book or an idea that I thought they might be interested in;). People might be getting sick of me! I often tell my kids I’m sending it to “so and so” and they might ask later if I’ve heard back or whether I sent “so and so” an idea about a certain show or place. It kind of catches on…

Finally, I’m game for listening to and checking out everyone’s  ideas. I’m appreciative when M forwards me links and photos and tells me about upcoming events. I dash to the window when S mentions the unique bird. I show interest in things they want to show me like skateboard fails on YouTube and wedding bloopers. I’ve shot quite a few hoops when invited and I regularly accept an invitation to play the game Word Chums even though I get left in the dust and have only managed to win against L twice.

I don’t always accept the things they suggest though. I can’t commit to reading an entire series of fantasy novels no matter how much S thinks I would get into them if I tried. I feel the same way about some movies.  I made it through most of Lord of the Rings  movie trilogy but The Hobbit? Not quite. And the series he recommended to me? Even if I liked and understood fantasy better, I truly don’t have time to commit to reading a series right now and that’s OK. Strewing is not about someone feeling that they absolutely must try or learn something.

What is Strewing Not?

It’s not manipulative. It’s not meant to trick your kids into learning something or working on something. It’s not meant to sway someone into seeing things your way. You may want your kids or other family members to do certain things or understand things from your perspective but upfront, honest conversation is likely the avenue for that, not Strewing.

It comes from knowing a person in such a way that it’s fun and meaningful to offer something you think might spark or build on their interest OR at our house, in genuinely sharing something you’re interested in that you’d like to let them in on.

It’s not always accepted. Sometimes my kids are interested in things I’ve found or discovered. Sometimes they’re not. The graphic novels I mentioned? Never been glanced at. The chess game? Played immediately.

They are actually more likely to be interested in something I’m sharing that I’ve found interesting rather than something related to one of their interests that I think they might like. Maybe they’re just being polite – I think that’s part of it – but I also think that I don’t always understand the depth that they’re working at in some areas and I don’t quite hit the mark with ideas. That’s ok. Sometimes I do.

Life is everywhere and it’s fun to find things of interest to “strew” for others. When it’s done from a genuine thought that a particular person might enjoy or be looking for something, it’s really just sharing. It builds connection. Empathy. Perspective. Fun:).

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